Today’s To Do List

To Do:

  1. Read my email
  2. Read my boss’ email
  3. Read daily blogs
  4. Update my charting
  5. Clean my desk
  6. Dust my plants
  7. Clean out food drawer
  8. Update Phone Number List
  9. Update Speed Dials
  10. Dust pictures
  11. Go through pending transactions
  12. Follow up on address changes
  13. Find recipes for cranberry oatmeal bars and meatloaf
  14. Find out if friends actually like meatloaf
  15. Check blogs again to see if anyone updated

Hmmmmmmm. How is it not even 12:30 and I have finished almost all of my list already? Damn me for being too productive for my own good.

All the proof I need that I trained my boss right

This morning when I got to work I found this note on my desk:

If you have trouble with my computer it’s because I renewed my subscription to Symantec and I probably messed something up!

That’s right. Gotta keep ’em thinkin’ that they can’t do anything right without you. Now that’s what I call job security!

Amusing and Annoying II

How to amuse me:
Come upstairs after being quarantined to the family room with the other husband, the children, and the dogs while I was hosting a party upstairs and murmur, “Barney is so annoying.” I instantly ask what he did when it suddenly becomes clear you are talking about the purple dinosaur Barney not our friend Barney. Further proving I married the right man.

How to annoy me:
Hit your stapler with the force you would hit an enemy. You know, where you actually wind up to generate more power. Come on, is that really necessary? I think they heard you all the way down the hall!

How to amuse me:
Tell me that you think the hallway smells like mothballs and proceed to tell me this dirty joke:
     Have you ever smelled moth balls?
     How did you get their little legs apart?

How to annoy me:
Meet my sister, Jeni, and ask if she is my younger sister. Ummm, she is eight years OLDER than me. She has an 11-year-old child. Do I look like I could have an 11-year-old child? Wait. Don’t answer that…

How to amuse me:
Ask me if I knew that a couple of our friends are getting “married” at our house tonight, in an attempt to plan an elaborate April Fool’s Day hoax. Confirming that some of our friends really have too much time on their hands.

Things actually said over dinner last night

“Humans should come with ramrods, just like rifles.”

“I’m pretty sure it’s the prostitution.”

“Nick had a pretty good day-he already got felt up by a girl.”
“…And it wasn’t Lindsay.”
“Had that been said by anyone other than her father it would be disturbing.”

“Lights are off: let’s get naked!”

“Get out the Crisco, grease Nick up, send him down the road.”

“I like you. You have nice…body parts.”

“Wanna carve a ‘tit’ pumpkin this year?”

“Sorry. I just have to tease a Megan. I don’t care which Megan.”

JKR’s Site Updated

I feel like a bad Harry Potter fan. I have to admit that I haven’t checked J.K. Rowling’s site as often as I should. To be honest, I was getting disappointed every time I checked and nothing was new. (But I still check the CBBC almost daily because they are full of fun, silly info about anything and everything HP) I know what you are gonna say, this just means that JKR is working on the book, but still.

But, BUT! today I was bored and on a whim I pulled up the site. Low and behold, things were different! Subtle differences, mind you, but differences nonetheless. There is new candy strewn across the desk. The butterfly is now orange instead of blue. The portkeys were all new; what was once a gum wrapper is now a pencil sharpener, the pen is now glasses, the hair band is an eraser, the tea cup is a hairbrush. Anyway, you get the point. I figure JKR was bored with the look and had Lightmaker update things a little.

Oh but they didn’t stop at the main page. They added more Easter eggs! I have found six new things (well only five of them give you scrapbook items, but I still consider the sixth one “found” then again maybe I just haven’t completed it yet?) bringing my scrapbook total up to 12. And let me tell you, the rewards are so cool. Lightmaker has gone and made the rewards zoomable (including the old rewards, so don’t forget to check those out again) so they are much, much easier to read. They haven’t managed to make JKR’s handwriting and more legible, but I think I can overlook that small detail. 😉 Let me know if you find any more. Or email/comment if you need a hint!

Oh hold

Phone timer: 00:05:19

Should I just hang up? Call back after lunch….Nah. I am sure it will just be a couple more minutes.

Phone timer: 00:11:28

I think I can actually predict what song is coming on the hold music next. Gimme a minute…

Phone timer: 00:18:43

Oh. Dear. Lord. Thankfully I have a headset. My ear would be bleeding if I had to actually hold the receiver to my head all this time.

Phone timer: 00:24:34

Make it stop! Please make the hold music stop!

Phone timer: 00:36:24

How the hell can I possibly be on hold this long? Am I even really still connected? Am I lost in the abyss now? Please, please make the hold music stop….

Phone timer: 00:41:03

Wait. Was that a person? Was that a click? Was I just disconnected? I swear the music just faded into a pause!

Phone timer: 00:45:11

So what is a reasonable amount of time to wait on hold, cause I am sure this is NOT it. Ok, I promise myself, if it gets to one hour, I will just hang up and call back after lunch.

Phone timer: 00:52:27


Phone timer: 00:59:54

Dammit. I cannot take it anymore. And I know as soon as I hang up, it will be my turn. Urrrrr. Screw it. I need to eat.

**Updated** I finally spoke to a real person today after being on hold for only 40 minutes. But this time I was prepared with snacks and blogs to read!

Did that just happen?

Simeon is at his CFUG meeting tonight and I have the house to myself. What better time to girl it up, right? So I decided I was going to put on a mud mask. (I try to avoid doing masks when Sim is around because he loves to make me laugh when I have one on and it hurts to smile, you know, because of all the cracking) I grabbed the tube, shook it down, flipped the top and squeezed. Damn if there wasn’t a huge air-bubble and green-gray mud splattered all over my bathroom. In the sink. On the counter. Covering the mirror. I even found some all the way over on the toilet tank. I honestly just stood there looking around thinking, “Oh. My. God. Did that just happen?”

Then I scoured my entire bathroom. Thank God tomorrow is cleaning day.

My Second Blog-o-versary

It’s hard to imagine that it has been two years since I started keeping track of my daily life via this blog. It seems like so much, and at the same time so little, has happened over the past two years. But I can just scroll through the archives and see for sure. I truly enjoy the things my blog has brought into my life. I am able to click through my entries and know exactly what I was feeling on a particular day, remember all the things that were happening in my life, and witness how the world around me is changing.

I started writing in a diary/journal when in I was in 3rd grade. My teacher, Mr. Bear, had all of his students write every day in a journal. We would hand them in and he would write back either commenting on the entry or answering any questions we might have had. (You could say, he was my first loyal commenter!) I am sure it was some sort of writing exercise, but it taught me to reflect on my life and my thoughts. Needless to say, after 3rd grade I continued with my own personal journal and carried on all throughout high school. And I still have every single journal today. I love flipping through the dog-earred pages and reflecting on who I used to be.

But I have to admit, the Internet has evolved journaling in a way I never thought possible. Rather than having to flip through endless pages of hand-written entries, looking for one particular thing, I now have Google! With a couple clicks, and a well-formatted search string, I can find a specific post in a matter of second. And sure, I still have the option of a leisurely stroll down memory lane, should the need arise.

I remember when I discovered blogging. A little over two years ago, when Heather was pregnant with Lindsay, she and I were trying to look up some pregnancy related thing and stumbled across Dooce. Needless to say, I quickly become addicted and have since read all the archived entries. But it inspired Heather and I. We both begged our respective husbands to create our own blogs. For Heather, it allowed her to share her newborn daughter and the chaos and blessings that brought into her life with those of us separated from them by distance. For me, it was also a way to share things with family and friends afar. But it also brought an unexpected closeness with local friends. By allowing them access into our daily lives, rather than weekly or even monthly visits, we no longer have the awkward “So what have you been doing?” “Oh nothing” conversations. We now dig a little deeper: “So have you worked out the dilemma you were having the other day?” or “I cannot believe I missed that party. It sounded like so much fun!”

But I would be lying if I said it was all positives. The danger of exposing your thoughts and feelings is sometimes they can offend or hurt others. I have been stung on several occasions by comments made on my entries. Things said in humor can be misconstrued or taken out of context in the mind of another reader. This has forced me to often censor my writing. I don’t necessarily share my inner thoughts and personal reflections in fear that someone out there may disagree or even diminish my feelings.

For my husband, Simeon he sometimes forgets that I publish the daily happenings in our lives and people in his “virtual circle of friends” can access it as well. On more than one occasion he will be IMing with someone on the other side of the country and they will ask him if we finally finished the work on our fence or congratulate us on planning to start a family. Often caught off-guard, he quickly recovers by remembering that I must have blogged about it.

So thanks to all of you who read, those of you who comment, and those of you who keep my husband on his toes! I don’t think it would be as easy to keep coming back here if it were not for all of you. Here’s to another great (and hopefully exciting!) year.

Ben’s 3rd Birthday

My youngest nephew just turned three. THREE. Which means that my oldest niece, Maile, is a teenager. My brother pointed out that, between his five kids, he will have at least one teenager in his house for the next 20 years. How insane is that? Luckilly they are all super cute.

If you are Ben, being a three year old boy means your life is filled with two things: sports and balls. His main joy is pointing out whether something is a “baffetball,” a “foooball,” or a “bee ball.” Oh and occasionally there are even “sokka balls.” Man, is that kid easy to please.

Amy made a couple of lovely ball shaped ice cream cakes, which the kids just loved. Check out the details on each ball! Amazing.

I took Hayden with me to the party since the rest of his family were busy volunteering at their church. Let me tell you, it is futile to try and explain to a four year old that it is not the party itself which ages you, but your actually birthday. He insisted, “Ben is two. After his party, then he will be three.” I finally gave in and figured, according to his reasoning, that means I am closer to 16 than I am to 26. Grrrreat.

All in all, it was a great day. Spending time with my adorable nieces and nephews, listening to their stories, and watching the look of sheer happiness glaze across their faces that only cake and ice cream can bring.
All of the pictures I took during the party are over here. Enjoy!

Calm before the storm?

Things are quiet. Unnaturally so. To the point that I am almost concerned. At work, this is our busiest time of the year: tax time. Usually I am pulling my hair out, trying to speak through clenched teeth and wondering why I even get out of bed each morning. However, these last couple days have been really slow. So I am perpetually waiting for the proverbial other shoe to drop.

In the mean time, things are going to be quiet on the home front as well. I just shipped Simeon off to Minnesota for the weekend. I kept meaning to rent Fargo
before he left so he could adapt more easily to the accent, but we didn’t have a chance. That and I think the wood chopper part might have freaked him out just a little bit.

So this weekend it’s just me. All alone. “Alllllll by mysellllllf,” comes to mind. But alas I have a hot date with my Nick & Nora flannel pajamas, the special features on the new Harry Potter DVD and some strawberry cheesecake ice cream. Good times. Then tomorrow I am attending a benefit dinner with my Dad, sister and her family. So at least I have their chubby little faces to entertain me. And Sunday I am heading to the beach for the day. My youngest nephew is having his third birthday party. I am sure adorable pictures are forth coming. I know you can’t hardly wait. Until then, have a great weekend everyone!