The Story of Simzgirl

I can breathe again. Whew. I just got back from the dentist. I must admit I haven’t been to the dentist in, oh I don’t know, four or five years. Shame on me. I know, slap my hand. But in all honesty the past has proven it’s just not necessary. I have never had any […]

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Did you miss me? I know I haven’t been around here much and I have been on other people’s blogs even less. Urgh. This time of year is super hectic at work and when I get home after working out I can barely manage to feed myself, let alone think of anything witty to say. […]

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What is the key to having a fabulous weekend at the beach while celebrating your brother-in-laws 21st birthday? It’s simple really:
FAMILY +

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Today has been a very odd day for me. I started off this morning by knocking the glass shower door completely off. I don’t even know how I did it, because I only bumped it slightly with my knee and I didn’t even get a bruise (those of you who know me, know I bruise […]

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“I will so stop at the nunnery. I am not kidding.”
“So it all comes back to Salem.”
“If you put Megan and I together we make a whole ass. Awwww.”
“We were the dealers too, but we were the gangsters.”
“If you are gonna be the slut, be the head slut.” “I told the other sluts what to […]

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Happy Anniversary!!
March 15, 2004 was officially the day I started blogging. I can’t even believe it’s been a year already. I feel like I haven’t really done much in the last year, but because of this very blog, I am able to go back and actually see all the things I have done. And the […]

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Seattle was great. Vacations are fabulous. Friends make everything better. And I am relying on the old “a picture is worth a thousand words” expression to say the rest. Good-night all!

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“Oh shit. You said vegetable.”
“There should be a children’s book called Squirrels with Guns. It could be on the shelf next to Everybody Poops and Paddington Bear.”
“You know, when I was off.”“Off your rocker?”
“Oh the consuela is strong with this one.”
“Can someone be orally dyslexic?”
“And that is the cue for me to go downstairs with […]

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Today my little girl turns 4.
It’s hard to imagine that Simeon and I have had her for that long. It seems like just yesterday we picked her out of the litter of eleven. She was special from the very beginning. The way she waddled across the floor to lick Simeon’s foot. We knew she was […]

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“Oh! Pardon my nipples.”
“Don’t worry, those are functional now.”
“I can’t believe no one picked my ‘pile of pillows.’”
“You mean I have to say ‘erection’ five more times?”
“Just wait until he gets really mad. He turns purple.”
“Ahhhhh. Shwetty balls. Good times.”
(Phil & Chelle, feel free to let me know if I left anything out!)

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